We are in uncharted territory. The world feels a bit uneasy, and very uncertain. The last time our little corner of the world felt this way, it was when Kinley was born. Her first year was a blur of anxiety, long appointments, and flashes of the most intense joy. That was the year our sweet two year old, Mason, dumped 5lbs of pancake mix on the floor. We found him playing in it, and that moment changed me in ways I don't have words to really explain. I was pulled above water by the shouts of seasoned moms saying "Play with him! Capture it! What blissful chaos! I wish I could go back to this kind of mess!" I heard them, and while I was treading water that first year, I held onto their advice like it was my life ring. "Find bliss even in the chaos."
That same year I was sent a shirt. It had a circle that said JOYFUL NOISE. Ironic, because at the time the possibility of Kinley not hearing felt very real. I have had the privilege to work with that brand many times in the last three years. I owe Kelly the worlds biggest hug if we ever meet in real life. She taught the most pessimistic person in the world (just ask my husband, it's true) to be a joy seeker, even when it feels impossible. This week I found Kinley Roo (2) playing happily in the middle of 5lbs of pancake mix. She was wearing that same t-shirt and singing as she played. Lost in her own little world. This time I didn't clean up the mess. I grabbed my camera and sat down near her. I cried, and I laughed at the absolutely beautiful blissful chaos in front of me. Then we played together.